Mike Huber, Guest Writer

This question came up when I was reading Sacred Gender: Create Trans and Nonbinary Spiritual Connections by Ariana Serpentine for a Queer Theology discussion group. When I first heard this question, thinking how my thoughts and ideas can extend from my own mind to those in my family or community and maybe even society as a whole, I inadvertently shifted the question to “Where do I end?” 

In our Queer Theology discussion group, the conversation stayed focused on how our bodies are a part of and apart from the world, something I seldom thought about. We talked about the diverse ways we express or present ourselves. We may dress so others perceive us as a potential romantic partner, a potential hire for a job, or even dress to let others know we want to be left alone. Sacred Gender points out that all of us wear clothing and accessories as gender cues to alert others as to how we want to be perceived. This led us to parse out how our internal sense of identity is tied to how others perceive us. It feels good when others see us the way we see ourselves. 

The conversation took a different turn when someone brought up the fact that the cells in our bodies are literally made from the nutrients in our food which comes from the plants and animals we eat. The oxygen and water that sustain our bodies have traveled the planet passing through creatures throughout time. The line between my body and the rest of the world suddenly didn’t seem so obvious. 

This discussion deepened my understanding of Queer Theology. My original understanding had to do with how interpretations of the Bible and other religious texts could be broadened when considering LGBTQ+ people. As I read more, what struck me was the use of the word “queer” as a verb. “Queering” is the act of questioning boundaries that are often accepted as if they are universal truths, rather than simply social norms left unquestioned. The discussion that opened this article is an example of queering the dichotomy of self and the world. 

Queering can be applied to Biblical text. In his book, Trans-Gender: Theology, Ministry, and Communities of Faith, Justin Sabia-Tanis points out that though the Bible says God separated light from darkness and “called” them day and night, sunrise and sunset are times when those terms are blurred. And for many, those times are the most transcendent. The labels we give things imply clear and distinct entities, but the real world (or God’s creation from a theist point of view) is full of ambiguity. 

Back to my original question: “Where does your body begin and end?” Queer Theology has giving me a fresh perspective on the false dichotomy of mind and body. The idea that I somehow exist in my thoughts, and I simply inhabit a body can cause me to think my experience is universal; everyone would have the same thoughts as me if they were simply as enlightened. This is as offensive as it is destructive. The notion that my body and mind are separate entities actually separates me from others. When I acknowledge that I don’t have a body but that I am a body — that all I think, believe and know is based on my experiences, whether sensory, social or intellectual — I approach others with curiosity and compassion. Mind/body dualism creates division not only individually but also interpersonally. 

My journey into Queer Theology is just beginning, but it resonates with being Unitarian (oneness) and Universalist (wholeness). Questioning where my body ends and the world begins, leads me to wonder if that is where love is. Not power, not norms... but love. 

Notes: 

• At Unity Church, the LGBTQ+ group coordinates some of the LGBTQ+ programming with the congregation. Past events have included our Queer Retreat, conversation groups, and advocacy. For more information, contact Philippa Anastos at [email protected].
• For more information about inclusion and equity in the Unitarian Universalist Association, visit “Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer Justice." 

Lia Rivamonte (she/her), Beloved Community Communications Team 

​“I'm committed to the rigorous practice of knowing that I don't know and of being open to a multiplicity of possibilities.” Alfonso Wenker, Team Dynamics
 
Receive and Believe. When someone tells you who they are, believe them. It is an invitation to open our hearts and minds a little wider, to accept that the world may not always conform to some of our most deeply-rooted perceptions—in this case, that of gender; that gender is binary and this “fact” is to be regarded as not only sufficient, but a moral truth. Many or possibly, most of us feel able to declare our gender with certainty. We might ask ourselves, what precisely allows us this certainty?
 
As a cisgender female born and raised in a white, male-dominated society, this aspect of my identity (cisgender) has never been questioned, never been subjected to scrutiny, disbelief, or mockery. I may have been treated as less than equal for other reasons: for being in a brown body, for my Asian heritage, for an assumed immigrant status, and native language. But I have never experienced any doubt, or denial when I describe myself as being a woman. (Yes, women have historically been and are still sometimes perceived as inferior human beings by the dominant culture but that’s another story.)
 
I watched the YouTube video of and viewed the slides from the Team Dynamics’ LGBTQ+ Justice session, which was held on Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at Unity. I am sure it would have been a richer experience to be in the room and to participate in the group discussions but it is well worth the time to listen to the recorded session and click through the slides. Alfonso Wenker of Team Dynamics who led the session is an engaging and gifted facilitator.
 
The idea behind “receive and believe,” a phrase Alfonso repeated throughout the session, seems basic to those of us who have never feared rejection, hatred, bias, or outright bodily harm for how we name, describe, and/or present our own sexuality, sexual orientation, and/or gender must live into these words. When it comes to keenly personal descriptors regarding gender and sexual identity, do we take family members, friends, colleagues, neighbors, and strangers at their word? Do we avoid making assumptions based on how they present? Do we make them feel welcome in the spaces we frequent? Do we make an effort to use the terms they have shared that will help make them feel respected, included, and valued?
 
As Alfonso says, “We are all part of the social construction.” It is the construction of a few who are determined to hold onto their power. You have only to turn on the news and listen to any number of politicians who are determined to rein us in by legislating laws that try to dictate who we can and cannot be as sexual beings.  
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Placing limits on and ascribing nonnegotiable labels for gender, sexuality and sexual orientation, or reinforcing the binary, is an extremely powerful tool for controlling our bodies and our existence as full human beings. It is a way for those in power to enjoy comfort and security. Whomever controls the body, controls the wealth, Alfonso says, toward the end of his presentation.
 
Think about it the next time you hear our politicians who espouse a return to “family values” attempting to instill fear in the hearts and minds of the populace about trans affirming care, bathroom usage, and the “danger” of drag performances. Who are they really trying to protect?
 
The truth is, we are not so easily labeled. Picture the antiracist, multicultural, spiritually invigorating community we yearn for: lovely, messy, and full of mystery—a feast for the curious. Please, tell me who you are—give me a minute, and I will tell you who I am.